Recently, a post was swirling around social media asking people to, "Write a sad story using only 3 words." Curious as to what the answers would be, I started reading through them, until I came to an answer that dominated the rest. In fact, it very well could have been the cause of the majority of the sad stories. It was this simple and profoundly powerful statement;
“I did nothing.” - Posted by Michelle DeGrate, Vice President of Programs at Christian Community Action in Lewisville TX.
Those words represent the white space between the lines that fill the annals of history. That statement is the silent contribution of billions of humans to the ills of humankind. “When the man was bleeding in the street, I did nothing,” confessed the religious leader. “When they came for my neighbor, I did nothing,” mourned the German. “I knew it was wrong, but I did nothing,” said the business leader. “I disagreed with the majority, but I did nothing,” reiterated the politician. Google lists over 360 million links to articles and posts about the importance of leaders making a decision. However, research states we are more likely to be indecisive rather than decisive. So why? Why when confronted with problems do so many people choose to do nothing? Here are the three most common reasons that decisions are not made and what to do about it.
1. I DON’T HAVE THE DESTINATION IN MIND:
“One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree. ‘Which road do I take?’ she asked. ‘Where do you want to go?’ was his response. ‘I don’t know,’ Alice answered. ‘Then,’ said the cat, ‘it doesn’t matter.” ― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
Without a destination in mind, all choices are equally valid and invalid at the same time. No matter what your endeavor is, you need to have a destination in mind. Ask yourself, Where do I want to be in 10 years? Where do I want my company to be in 10 years? What would be the best for this person long term? How do I want to be remembered? By shaping your decisions around an ultimate destination, you will have less trouble determining between important decisions and everything else.
2. PARALYSIS BY ANALYSIS:
“Not everything that counts can be counted; not everything that can be counted counts.” - Albert Einstein
As recounted by Sheena Iyengar in her TED talk How to make choosing easier, CEOs make 50% of their decisions in 9 minutes or less and only 12% of their decisions take an hour or more of their time. Do you know which are your less than 9-minute decisions and which are your hour or more decisions?
Too many times we get stuck in a cycle of wanting more information before we make a decision. While I am a fan of having the right information, the fact of the matter is that you will never have enough to make a fool proof decision. There is always a risk in taking an action, but there is often a greater risk in inaction. So limit the amount of analysis you need to the importance of the situation. If it is a decision that you are likely not going to remember making a year from now, then it is a 9 minute or less decision. Make it quickly with the information you have on hand and move on. If it is something that you will remember, then start by cutting the choices down to a manageable size of 6 or less. Determine what additional information you will need and gather it quickly. Then make a choice. According to research, any decision you make based on the facts you have on hand is better than indecision. As more information comes to light, you may realize that you made the wrong choice, so pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and adjust course. Fail Forward Fast.
There is a very important caveat to this and that is, if someone is in danger, then the decision must be made now. There are times, when there is no time to analyze!
3. I FEAR THIS MIGHT CHANGE MY PLANS:
There is a fear that in making a decision, particularly if it means helping someone else, it will really mess up your plans. Well, I am here to say, it will! So what? Get over it.
My wife recently threw a surprise party for my 40th birthday and the room was filled with people that I have become friends with over the years. Looking around the room, I remembered when Jonathan called me at 5 o’clock on a Friday afternoon because one of his friends had swallowed a bottle of pills in a suicide attempt and he needed help to get him to the hospital. I remembered when Lee needed help moving from his second-floor apartment. I remembered when my son was sick in the hospital and when Chilli showed up so I could get some sleep and a shower. Don't fool yourself, life is not about you or your plans. Life is about relationships. And relationships are messy and don’t always fit nicely into your plans. Don’t be afraid, your plans are going to change, let them.
If you can come to the end of your life and say, “I had a destination in mind.” “I tried and failed, and tried again.” “I loved others and was loved by others, even when it was inconvenient.” When confronted with a fork in the road, “I did something.” Then that will have been a life well lived.
“DO SOMETHING!”
The Author: Joe Ader - Collective Action Expert, Change Catalyst, and Poverty Alleviation Consultant. Joe Ader brings practical experience and strategic direction to organizations wishing to engage in business and service with people living in poverty.